A while back on my instagram, I discuss our ‘feeding’ situation. I was blown away by the amount of positive comments and messages you guys sent over. I am SO blessed to get to be a part of such a FANTASTIC, positive group of women on my social media page. You guys were SUPER interested in reading a blog post outlining our story, why we started, how we started, and what we use. So your wish is my command. I’m so glad to take you along on our breastfeeding journey.
Let me start by telling you about Kate’s outfit, because I know all of the mom’s reading this are like… ‘OMG I LOVE HER ONSIE! AND THAT HEADBAND….!” No? Just me? Well I am a little biased. In case you ARE wondering that, you have to go check out Little Daisies Co. I’m obsessed. Her items are so unique and simple (which I love) but come in FANTASTIC colors and gorgeous textures. This is the little onesie Kate is wearing. I got hers in the size 3-6 months. It’s a tad big for her, but so is everything else. The little headband is also from Little Daisies Co. and I got the size 0-6 months but wish I would’ve gotten larger. It fits fine for now, but she won’t be able to wear it as long as I’d like. I got another piece as well that I’m going to be sharing on my instagram stories.
Ok. Now to on the goods.
So why did we even start thinking about formula? I’ll have to take you back to when Kate was around 5.5 months old. I had been exclusively breastfeed since she was born and it had been pretty darn successful. More successful that I had anticipated because you often hear how difficult breastfeeding is. And it IS, you guys. But I had been lucky enough to only have a few minor hiccups over the first 6 months.
But during month 5, something changed. I know now that Kate’s body was changing and growing, but while it was happening, I was perplexed. Around the end of month 5, Kate was getting IMPOSSIBLY FUSSY around 3 in the afternoon until bedtime. She was fussing at the breast and basically at every other minute during the afternoon. I was loosing my MIND, you guys! We basically avoided leaving the house after lunch I couldn’t figure out what was going on.
I looked up colic, but of course found that she was a bit too old to JUST now be showing symptoms. She was having plenty of wet diapers, though her dirty diapers had slowed down to every few days. But even this was super normal for babies her age as her digestive system matured. I messed around with her daytime and nighttime schedule to see if something was awry there, but nothing changed.
Thanksgiving realllllllyy gave us a show. We went down to my parents house for 5 days and she was a tiny little monster. I was miserable because she didn’t want to socialize with ANYONE making all the family activities SO hard.
It was at my parents house that I first brought up the idea of supplementing her with formula. I had exhausted every other avenue. My mom agreed that it might be something to look at but honestly, I was SUPER hesitant. There is certain stigma with breastfeeding/formula feeding that I 100% DID NOT think I was susceptible to. But when faced with this decision, I was really challenged by my inner bias.
So I basically wrote it off. At nearly 6 months, I actually started letting her try some solids, thinking that might ward off the formula for a while. She was already grabbing things off of my plate and bringing food to her mouth as well as sitting up unassisted. We started Baby Led Weaning and slowly let her attempt solids (we LOVE Baby Led Weaning and I will share more on that in the future). But it wasn’t helping the fussiness.
Then we went to her 6 month checkup. She was 100% perfectly healthy, but she hadn’t gained ANY weight for at least a month. We had gone in for a sick visit at around 5 months and when we went back in for our 6 month checkup, she had actually LOST weight. I freaked out at first, but my Doc wasn’t worried. The loss was insignificant (it could’ve been as simple as a wet diaper last time she weighed). She also said that lots of babies have a lull in their weight gain around this time and that if feeding and diapers were normal (which she assured me they were) then all was well. Kate is just petite (we we’re measuring in the 1st percentile)!
So I left, feeling ok. During the visit, we chatted a bit about weaning and what to do if I were to start supplementing because I wanted to be ready for the future. I never mentioned that I was thinking about doing it soon, but I did feel like I had ALL of the tools to start once I decided to.
When we got home later that evening, it hit me again. Maybe that was my problem. For some reason she wasn’t getting ENOUGH milk during the day. I did a lot of research and sometimes babies get impatient at the breast and so they get fussy. As a result of that, they aren’t getting enough nutrient during the day because they aren’t getting that good milk that comes later in the feed.
My milk has been weird since day 1. My mom calls it ‘skim milk’ because her babies never got chunky until after they finished breastfeeding and it seems the same happens with Kate. But mine was even more unusual than moms. For instance, I never had that moment in the beginning where I felt my milk come in. The only reason I knew it had come in was because I actually SAW the milk come out of Kate’s mouth. AND I don’t feel let downs. I assume I have them, but I don’t really feel them. I also have NEVER leaked and have the WORST trouble pumping more than 1 ounce at any sitting. And when I weaned her night feedings, I NEVER had any engorgement. In fact, I’ve never been engorged. I have slow producing milk.
I think my supply was fine. But I’m thinking maybe it took Kate LONGER than she wanted to to get the good milk. So, as she was growing, she was getting impatient and giving up when she didn’t get full as fast as she need. I’m sure I could’ve worked really hard to try and remedy the situation and continue breastfeeding, but honestly, I was emotionally spent.
And THAT totally OK! I felt guilty for it at first and I didn’t realize HOW much pressure I put on myself to produce for her (something I have little control over) until faced with this decision. Keith and I discussed it at length and he is SO supportive. He just wanted me to do what I felt good about. Kate was healthy either way.
So one night as I was lying away worrying about something that hadn’t even happened yet, I said a prayer. I asked God to give me a sign. My deal with God was that if Kate woke up at 3 or 4 am again (her sleep was starting to be affected) that I would start giving her a bottle of formula every day. I quickly fell asleep and nearly forgot. But at 3 am, I heard Kate stirring and begin to cry. I lay there wanting to cry and remembered my deal with God. But in that moment, I thought, “Kassy, you are so dumb. God doesn’t make deals. He doesn’t have time to bother Himself with your petty games.” So I nursed Kate, cried a little, and tried to settle her back down to sleep.
When we all woke up the next morning, I told Keith about all of it. And let me tell you, this is why God intends for us to have partners in life. Because sometimes I’m DUMB and need to be reminded of God’s provisions. Keith listened to my story and said, “Kas, that was your sign. Do you honestly think God didn’t hear you. He DOES have time and sometimes He plays our little games because we NEED Him to. And he always takes care of His children’s needs!”
Boy was that a wake up call. So long story short, we gave her her first bottle of formula around 3 pm that afternoon. She was a new kid, or should I say, her old self. Happy, fun, and giggly. I couldn’t broken down right there and cried out Thanks to the LORD (I did, but it was more internal). That evening, we went out to dinner with friends and Kate was fantastic. I have never felt so assured of a decision than I did in those moments.
I’m not saying that formula is YOUR solution, but I am saying that you should take it to God. Ignore your worries and the idea that YOU aren’t enough. Because honestly, you’re not. Not without Him. But with His help, you are MORE than enough for your child. Breastfeeding, bottle feeding, it doesn’t matter as long as you are feeding on the word of God, trusting Him, and teaching your child to do the same!
So what did we use?
Like I mentioned above, we discussed formula a bit at the Doctor’s office. She told me to start simple with a basic one and go from there. I had a sample of Similac Pro-Advance so I did some research and loved that it had HMOs (Human Milk Oligosaccarides) which are the third most abundant ingredient in breast milk after fat and carbs! It helps to support baby’s immune system!
So far, it’s been great! I assumed we’d have some trouble with her taking it, but she took it like a champ. I think this is in part due to our Como Tomo bottles, which she LOVES. If you do have trouble, it’s recommended to mix it with breast milk and slowly decrease the amount of breast milk ever day. I think the other part of why she took it so easy can be attributed to Baby Led Weaning. She’s had the opportunity to try MANY new tastes and textures so this was just one more.
As of today, we’ve been giving 1 bottle a day for a month. And earlier this week, I introduced a second! I want to slowly wean her to only nurse in the mornings during our Disney trip in late May. Our mornings are our favorite time of the day. Since I work from home, we get to take a little extra time hanging out in the mornings and I’m totally not ready to give up that sweet time with her just yet.
I’m so fortunate to be able to continue nursing WHILE using formula. I’m appreciative for the opportunity to see it from both sides of the issue and I can say with certainty that BOTH methods are BEAUTIFUL! And as a bonus, I feel a HUGE weight off of my shoulders knowing that Kate is getting what she needs and I let myself have a physical and emotional break. We have to take care of ourselves, moms. I know we often forget but that’s just as important as taking care of baby!
Kate approves this post and has made typing it 150% more difficult this morning. She’s having a mom’s lap only day. If I have 450 mistakes, you can blame them on her tiny little fingers that are discovering that my keyboard has buttons.
I love to hear about others breastfeeding journeys. You can comment below!
